The problem with watching an Australian Western is that my love for Neighbours, Prisoner Cell Block H and pretty much everything else Aussie TV (apart from Home & Away, boo, spit) could’ve made getting into this week’s film tricky, as I potentially could’ve just spent the whole movie saying “wasn’t he in that? I remember her from that!”
But it wasn’t an Aussie that caused the early problems in that regard, but Ray Winstone turning up and me expecting to him to offer an early payout on Swindon’s 2-0 half time lead against Port Vale.
Luckily, he smashed a teenage boy in the face with the butt of a pistol, and sent Mike from Neighbours off to kill his evil brother (that was the proposition – I missed it, cos I was pouring wine) and I could quickly start engrossing myself in the film.
‘Uncompromising’ would be the main word I’d used. Gritty, sand, flies, dry, arid, the dusty outback, Aborigines doing their stuff, it really makes me wonder why Aussie Westerns aren’t more common place.
Brutal too. At least in Vampire crazed ‘Near Dark’ and other worldly gorefest ‘Bone Tomahawk’ I’d mentally prepared myself. Not so here, and when the same teenage boy (who didn’t have much luck) was whipped with a Cat o’ Nine tails til they wrung the blood out and he died, it was probably the hardest scene I’ve had to watch in the ten weeks so far!
Even when Tiger Gleeson off Round the Twist turned up and sang a Canadian folk song. Even when Emily Watson looked permanently sad and stroked Ray Winstone’s beard. Even when fake Rita Connors off Wentworth patched up Mike from Neighbours arrow puncture wound with what looked like Pesto and garlic butter.
You know I like to talk about the pub scene(s). Was a bit disappointed this hotel never got visited …. I can only assume it is Fullers owned and has still been reopened yet following lockdown.
The one ‘bar’ we did see was a bit like a micropub version of the Anchor Anchor in Shropshire. The landlord had been murdered, so the only local, John Hurt as a mad bounty hunter had to pour Mike from Neighbours a drink. Mike then knocked him out. Plain Jane Superbrain wouldn’t have allowed him to go so rogue, so quickly.
It was such a humid evening here in York, that added to the atmosphere. Alex the Apple sweltered as my crappy fan failed to do a job. I had to close all doors, windows, blinds, to create a cinematic effect. I was sweating throughout.
The wine thankfully was splendid and, quite confusingly, Austrian. A Blaufrankisch grape variety, 12.5% , a bit lighter than some, fruity, peppery and all that jazz. Never has drinking a bottle been easier! I’m on a detox week due to too much Surrey beer, but Red Wine doesn’t count as it is a fruit first, alcoholic drink second. Probably.
One packet of Wotsits was rolled for the first time ever, that probably helped.
Lamb & Mint burgers were the food of choice, extra gherkins, random lump of Feta cheese, and some additional nachos if I needed them (which I didn’t).
All in all, a successful return to WWWSI after a week off. Next week (unless Daddy Wotsit stymies me with a Fox suggestion), we have The Shootist (John Wayne’s last ever film), old world wine from Turkey (that’s a new one), plenty of cheese & buffet style food, and sadly I’ve rolled a ‘6’ on the Wotsits front as always seems to happen when much cheese is involved!
Take care and stay cool, Si