WEEK 26 - GREED (1924)

As freezing fog wrapped its icy tendrils around the Vale of York on a classically bleak mid January afternoon, only one thing could lift us from lockdown desolation in the absence of 'the pub'™.

You've guessed it, a bottle of red wine, copious Wotsits and a Western motion picture.

Tendrilification

I had postponed the usual Thursday night slot due to a 48 hour bout of food poisoning, or at least a 'dodgy tum'. Monday night's Pukka Pie had been further out of date than I'd realised, and I'd been feeling the effects. Friday was the first day I'd felt settled again, but even then, this was a real 'in at the deep end' return to eating and drinking.

Prepared for worst case scenario

At least the Wotsit dice roll was relatively forgiving, coming out at a '3'. I'm all about the cheesy giant Wotsits these days, and 3 x 16.5 = 49.5g which even on my rather unreliable scales, was fairly easy to weigh out (if you aim at 50g). Here's wot it looks like.

Cheesy Peasy Lemon Queasy

This week's wine took us back to Italy for the first time since week 17, the grape variety being Montepulciano.

Luckily, I'd been presented with a bottle of this back in the heady days of summer, courtesy of Mummy and Daddy Wotsit, one of whom disapproves of #WWWSI whilst the other is a big fan. I warmed it up in the boiler for a bit cos that is what my parents do with red wine.

My Red Wine bible told me what it always does when we have an Italian grape, pair it with pizza or pasta. So I went for the former, pepperoni Sainsbury's to be exact. This evening wasn't the time for heroics.

Unfortunately, I was so busy dancing around my kitchen to a Jive Bunny megamix in my spectacular new suit jacket, I was unaware I'd slightly overcooked it.

Oi dickhead, there's a pizza burning behind you!

No big disaster, but one minute less would've made all the difference

Oh well, some garlic mayo for the super crusty crusts, plus some olives and ricotta stuffed peppers took the edge off, and with the Wotsits on fine form, it still made for a highly digestible feast, which was no mean feat under the slightly turbulent stomach conditions.

This evening marked the half year anniversary of #WWWSI , and as such it was fitting, right and proper that the film should ultimately take centre, as we 'went through' to the nerve centre.

The 52nd greatest ever 'Western' of all time according to my list, though the overall 191% aggregate approval rating suggests it could even push the top ten.

Greed was unique in so many ways. Having been released in 1924, it became the first silent movie I'd seen so far, possibly in my entire life. But that wasn't the half of it! The film was originally nine hours long. NINE! The studios cut it to two. Director Erich Von Stroheim was apoplectic. Most of the other footage was lost or deleted. Tonight's version was 3 hours and 58 minutes long, as they had used stills to try and recreate the original story to EVS's wishes.

A bit like the Loch Ness Monster, rumours and fables circulate as to the 'holy grail' of those missing 7 hours. One even states a copy is held in a South American mine, and is shown once every New Year's Eve to a small audience. The things people do to avoid Jools Holland.

3 hours and 58 minutes was far too gruelling, I should probably have watched it over two nights (there was even an intermission to indicate where that could've been easily achieved). Being a silent film, I couldn't even fully relax, as I had to read the bits on screen to help follow the plot! Like this kind of thing......

Greed told the story of this bloke whose Mum encourages him to become a dentist. The actor was from Spennymoor, and you don't get many Hollywood A-listers from there nowadays.

His new wife wins the lottery, but as we so often find in Westerns (and not just ones called Greed), money became their ruination. The film flits between the humourous, quirky and downright sinister, still at this length, it had time to be!

This cat was trying to get to two canaries for what seemed like hours......

There wasn't much social distancing going on down at the local boozer

Stalybridge Buffet Bar, is that you?

And whilst I cannot give you any spoilers under 'Basic's Law (2020)', the fact that the final half an hour, played out in Death Valley, had me gripped to the conclusion, said a lot for the quality of the film, considering the endurance factor. And remember, I found Dances with Wolves, Giant and Treasure of the Sierra Madre all too drawn out. For me, no film should be over 2.5 hours.

My tummy remained settled, the wine was a real fruit bomb explosion, and at 12.5%, not as strong as many recent ones. I slept for a solid 10 hours, and all in all, Week 26 had been a success.

ANY OTHER BUSINESS

Three new followers to introduce you to, taking the numbers in our slightly dysfunctional family (if you don't mind me calling you that) to 57.

First up, we have Axholme Rob (#55) who has always seemed a kind, generous bloke from the #BRAPA side of things. He hails from Epworth, which is significant to me because it is first town where I specifically used a Good Beer Guide to find a pub! This was (I think) the Red Lion Hotel, before Hull City lost at Scunthorpe on 15th Dec 2001.

Secondly, we have Jane Stuart (#56) a Blackpool fan and fantastic writer / blogger, check out her work at janestuart.co.uk , loved Saturday's recent virtual away day pub crawl of Hull and I must be honest, they definitely deserved a point.

Me drinking Honey Dew during the game in the hope George HONEYman was DEW a goal

And thirdly, just sneaking in under the radar this eve is Ploppy Son of Ploppy (#57), another name I know well from #BRAPA , and I wonder if it is anything to do with Ploppy the drummer from Burnley's finest The NotSensibles. Anyway, all good and welcome Rob, Jane and Ploppy.

And a FOURTH follower (#58) is primed, ready to tell you about next week.

Hopefully, Rob, Jane & Ploppy (a sort of modern day Rod, Jane & Freddy) were not too sad to miss the cut for the #WWWSI Trophy first round. Results at the bottom if you missed them, and the draw for round two will be next Sunday so stay tuned you lucky (I mean skilful) 32 who made it through (you are in yellow).

Our week 27 film (Thu or Fri) will be The Homesman. Wine is Nebbiolo. Food will be extravagant. Wotsit volumes TBC. Stay tuned.

Thanks for reading, Si