Saturday 7th January 2023, hey look at me blogging in the same month I visited pubs in for the first time since last summer. I'm catching up, and the quest to be fully caught up by the time my first BRAPA holiday of 2023 starts on 13th Feb is looking like a real possibility.
I'm actually more passionate about this blog catch up than visiting the damn irritants at the moment!
Pubs that open before 12 noon on a rainy January day deserve a special BRAPA seal of approval, so Marrowbone & Cleaver, Kirmington (2271 / 4175), consider yourself BRAPA approved. The name might scream 'GASTRO', it might be owned by a famous former Motorbike Guy, but it is actually rather better than I expected. Impressed with the landlady firstly - friendly and ballsy. That sets the tone for the whole pub, basically a 'you do right by us and we'll do right by you' ethos. Two signs about kids behaving themselves on the same mantelpiece, and another on the bar basically saying 'if you've got a problem with us, tell us to our face, don't slag us off on social media ya cowards'. I like it! Daddy BRAPA thinks my choice of seating is weird. I've pushed through a door and I'm sat facing the fire on a low down occasional table with Airfix model plane, in what is supposed to be restaurant waiting area. I tell him to stop moaning. The Bateman's is nicely kept, not quite to my taste, but being Lincs, you'll get trickier beer challenges ahead. The place left a positive impression on me.
Next stop on today's North Lincs agenda, this town called 'Brigg'. About two miles from Hull if you are a strong swimmer, I'm not, hence why this was my Brigg debut. TWO GBG pubs in one place? Ooh Lincs you are really treating me. Town felt proper derelict as we walked on through, but we kept smiling in a wary sort of way ..... for now :
No cask alert at the Black Bull, Brigg (2272 / 4176) and it was one of those rare GBG situations where, although they did have glasses over two handpumps, it seemed no big deal to them. The rammed nature of the pub suggested cask was the last thing they needed in order to survive! "We do have bottles of Doom Bar though" says the pragmatic landlady, and after a second of considered thought, I go for a pint of Guinness which I end up enjoying more than is reasonable. "They've not sold cask in there for about the last year" we were told in our next pub when the subject arose. But back in the Black Bull, it feels as much like a bookies as much as it did a boozer. Pubs certainly ain't dead yet! A first GBG entry since 2015, and I dare say the last for a while.
Maybe we'd have better luck at Brigg's more regular GBG entry?
"Oooh what a lot of ale!" I say at the bar in Yarborough Hunt, Brigg (2273 / 4177) and the landlady looks at me inquiringly, hence the need to explain what's just happened down at the Black Bull. A soothing, spartan kinda place, I could tell by the comedic Joshua Tetley on the inn sign that we were onto a winner here. A newspaper rack only enhances that view. Free coffee too, is that real?! Didn't particularly enjoy my pint of 'Bomber County' despite the SIBA bronze medal bit sticking up off the pump clip - kept fine, but like so many Lincs vintage plane themed beers, seemed a bit dull. But in more exciting news, Dad was illegally parked but as we were parked right outside, we could keep an eye out for any zealous wardens. Sadly, no incident occurred apart from trying to get the car started when we left!
Onwards and westwards, by a matter of degrees, to our fourth of six ticks today .......
Sneaking in through the backdoor of Sutton Arms, Scawby (2274 / 4178) and that is another theme I'm finding in January, pubs closed from the front, and having to go investigate around the back. For a hefty roadside pub, it has quite the rural country pile feel, friendly efficient delicate staff, and it isn't long before Dad has a glint in his eye and is peering over at foodie blackboards. Not sure I've ever eaten pigeon before, quite a chewy old bird but tasty! Dad was hoping his fishcake might at least come with a shovel of chips, but hey this was startery fine dining fare. My ale, a house beer from Milestone who I never seem to love, promised 'pear drops and crystal toffee' but it just tasted like a pint of bitter to me!
We weren't messing about today, and continued our westerly progress to Messingham ......
Two GBG pubs here, but the one that sounds like a wine bar (Pooley's) doesn't open until 6pm even on a Saturday, so that was off the agenda today. Seems a GBG regular though, so I might have to try and sneak it in late on a Thirsty Thursday bus route. Looks do-able.
But for now, it was time to pose for a photo in the sun outside the one which was open, which meant going full vintage Radio 4 comedy ......
Yes, I went round the Horn Inn, Messingham (2275 / 4179) ..... labouring on a joke that bad really wasn't worth it was it? Like the previous pub, it had an element of flouncy dining about it, but the warm welcome (I describe the staff as 'fluffy' which confused a man on Twitter) and good heat in the radiators meant any shortcomings are easily forgiven. My fellow pub ticker Eddie reckons the wine bar is pubbier than this. I believe him. With Tim Taylor Landlord away to have his hair done (currently being conditioned in the cellar ..... sorry, again the joke really not worth it), Wainwright Amber was the beer, best quality yet, and broke the run of seeing that Lincolnshire staple, Doom Bar in every pub. Dad had a different glint in his eye this time. "You want a coffee don't you?" I ask. "HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT IS WHAT I WAS THINKING?" Well, when you go pubbing with a chauffeur that often, you pick up all their mannerisms, and this time, it was not an orange J20 facial twitch. Once re-caffeinated, he then made up an amazing Messingham limerick which is probably available on his patreon.
If the day thus far seemed remarkably straightforward by BRAPA standards, especially considering Jan & rural Lincs, something had to give and it did at our next (and final) pub on the agenda.
A long drive out to a remote location by the banks of the Trent, everything on social media had suggested 2pm, but despite a light on, the pub sign clearly states 5pm. Annoying. Family run pub for the last 60 years, I guess they just do what they want and don't tell anyone. I'll ring ahead next time .... if there is a next time!
Shut pub alert, despite looking hopeful! With time on our side, and not wanting to end on a low, Dad says "anything else in the area we might be able to get to?" Isn't he good? I'll say it again, scandal he didn't win BRAPA Man of the Year '23.
I flick through the GBG, have a quick tap away at Google Maps, Facebook and Whatpub. Read out a postcode which Dad puts into the SatNav ..... and off we go.
Again, the remote location is River Trenty, and dusk is setting in when we arrive.
And if ending on a high is what we were after, then we've certainly done that at the Dog & Gun, East Butterwick (2276 / 4180). Arguably my pub of the day, in fact, no arguably about it, a clear winner. Busy, basic and boozery, it has an additional rockabilly/psychobilly theme going on, lots of posters of bands I like such as the Cramps and the Meteors, bit of Link Wray. The guv'nor is a right lad, bald and with a different glint in his eye from Dad's coffee or foodie ones from earlier. Exactly the kind of man who'll give you a sweet smile in a 'Demented are Go' wrecking pit, before kneeing you in the (groovie) goolies. The Dark Tribe ales are drinking well, even if their 'Terrier' logo is suspiciously identical to the old style York brewery effort. Cracking boozer though, there's even an eight year old being school on the art of #pubmanning by his encouraging father. We need a next generation. Cos I sometimes feel like when I get old, I'll be the last man standing (well, probably sitting).
Today has come full circle from staff eating to kids, to staff being eaten! #LincsLife Still early days for me in Lincolnshire, but this is decent progress and I now have 46 current GBG ticks, eclipsing my previous record of 41 in 2019. #BRAPAStats
Fast forward a week to 14th January 2023, and I took myself back to Notts, a county I'm making even greater progress in (and enjoying). I'll tell you about the first four of my six pubs in this part .......
Up first was this, a good 50 minute bus ride north of Nottingham.
Some pubs just get it right. That's my six word summation of Ginger Giraffe Micro Pub & Gin Bar, Underwood (2277 / 4181). I guessed it would be the case before I even arrived. Recognising the need to communicate ever changing winter opening hours, this pub uses their Facebook to post regular clear updates. How novel! Wish all micros could manage this. Two blokes are in charge, never have a safer pair of hands been felt, I bet they use mild green Fairy Liquid. Internet down, so I'm asked to pay by cash which is why kids, you've always gotta carry the stuff, even in 2023. Controversial decision to consciously swerve Titanic Plum Porter (a sign of the times?) in favour of the Ginger Giraffe Pale. How did I just know it was going to be like NBSS A*? Simply stunning. Good job it was neckable too, a 12:27pm bus meant I was really on a swift turnaround here. A vibrant place, a bit of comfort, I'd have been happy to stay for a session, and how often can you say that about a micro?
I bus it back as far as Eastwood, which isn't far and has two ticks. I get twitchy and press the bell far too early. And then, for the double whammy, I remember the pub on this side of town doesn't open til 1pm. Not ideal when I need to back in Nottingham for 6:15pm, I really needed to do everything to the letter today!
But I stride it out, in search of Eastwood's noon opener, here it is:
That corridor of uncertainty spanning West Notts and East Derbys really has a high concentration of micropubs, even in GBG terms, but they work, because you know, 'pints & people'. (Which definitely isn't a shameless plug for a CAMRA podcast I might feature on in Feb). Tap & Growler, Eastwood (2278 / 4182) is small, and packed with a healthy looking (trust me, but you can see below) Nottingham Forest throng who've got a local derby on today, not with Derby, but Leicester. "I recognise you" says this nice blue bald dude at the head of the pack. "BRAPA?" I surmise, and I'm correct. I ask who he is but he tells me he's more of a 'content sponge' than 'creator' so I wouldn't know his name (not an exact quote!) His real name is Nick, reassuring to know he wasn't Christened 'Blue Bald Dude', even if his mates now call him this based on my tweet! There's a Miles in there too, and plenty of others. Landlady is great, the 'Cold Weather Blues' by Castle Rock almost as stunning as the last pint, and here was me thinking I was all about the dark ales these days. I chat to a couple of lads at the 'bottom of the pack' before returning to Nick where I'm offered a free chip butty to take out, observe the nice pump clippy corridor and just time for a quick Liam Rosenior appreciation session before I leave. "I'll look forward to your write-up .... in a few months time!" quips Nice Nick Blue Bald Dude. You see, he GETS the struggle!
Lovely bunch. And I take full responsibility for their 2-0 win, just call me BRAPA Johnson Really should've peed before leaving, proper jogging down now to my next pub.
More Microey than I was expecting (NOT that I should be surprised in these parts), Gamekeeper's, Eastwood (2279 / 4183) is a larger building and has more room to swing a cat, or pheasant, though I think it is fair to say it leaves less impression on me than the other pubs today. The barmaid eyes me in a curious way too, either she's madly in love with me or she found my sudden dash to the loos amusing .... so almost certainly the latter. Despite having only just opened at 1pm (allegedly), there's a huge gaggle of posh twentysomethings and a couple of elderly barflies, one of whom I have to stick my head a bit too close to his heaving bosom to see the ales on the side! Glad I did though, the Dark Drake by Dancing Duck is another massive win. Honestly, when I fully ticked Derbyshire back in 2018, the local propaganda basically said 'don't bother crossing the border into Notts', but here I am in 2023 wondering if it is going to compete for my favourite BRAPA beer county to date? The place was a grower, warm and harder to leave than I'd anticipated, a bit like a womb.
As usual in BRAPA, the moment I let my guard down, it all goes to pot. Yup, I was basking in self satisfaction, smiling away, as I bus it to nearby Kimberley where I'd loved the Cricketers a few years back, but now had a micro to tick off.
But what was this? SHUT PUB ALERT! Sure I'd not seen this on their Facebook. Notts being Notts, a wired friendly local beanpole wandering past says "they always shut for the first two weeks of Jan, duck ... but plenty more pubs to do around here!" which is nice of him, but obviously he doesn't appreciate how ticking works. Then I drop my phone in some mud having a sly wee around the corner just to top off five minutes of misery.
I take the next bus to Hucknall and refresh the Facebook feed. Oh look, what a 'coincidence', they've done an update in the last hour ...... their first since Jan 1st where 3 local Nigel's became 4 local Nigel's. Wonder if they'd witnessed my exchange with the bloke outside and thought 'ooops, we best get something on social media!'
Whoever did the hugging heart emoji wasn't a pub ticker! Probably a Nigel. (*'They're' by the way) Whatever, I'm in no hurry to go back. Perhaps sack it off until the 2024 GBG, IF it gets in next time. Problem is now, it is isolated in an area of Notts where I don't have any other ticks to do alongside it. Though I guess Heanor , Ripley and South Normanton where I all need new ticks aren't too far off.
Happier times up in Hucknall to cheer me up, our last pub for part 15 ........
Byron's Rest, Hucknall (2280 / 4184) had the same kind of throbbing pre-match atmosphere as Tap & Growler, but this a more 'family' themed one, as I squash in at the far end amidst the remnants of R-Whites lemonade and Coke cans before Mummy & Daddy say "reet kids, we've got a game to get to!" and I'm left with a Covid denier, a man so old he saw Tommy Lawton in his prime, and a friendly Devon lady who takes some getting used to because she looks so much like a woman I worked with who I couldn't stand! Long thin, dimly lit (the pub not her), atmospheric happy and well run. When I return from the impossible to find sliding toilets, the landlady is in my place! "Sorry, I'm just warming up and you are in the best seat!" she says, indicating the heaters under the seats. I capitalise on this experience by asking if she'll do the GBG highlighting. "Very exact!" I say, watching her form a perfect block of green Stabilo. "That is the former art student in me coming out!" she replies. You can always tell.
Not Bass by the way, Shipstones in a Bass glass - point off for that! So there we have it! Fingers crossed, I can bang another one out late tomorrow night, it'll be action packed as we finish this Notts day off, see what Bingham has to offer in the first #ThirstyThursday of 2023, get lost in fields, say hello to Martin and Mrs RM in Sheffield, and return to outer Burnley for the first half of fun with our old pal, Beyond the Pale.
See you tomorrow, Si
