Saturday 13th January 2024
When this little fella appeared on my balcony and stared in at me a few weeks back, he seemed to be trying to tell me something ......
"BRAPA, now is the time to get the Wirral ticked, because I rhyme with it".
A strange request, but I've heard worse in this game.
(Splitting this blog into two bite-sized chunks, make it a bit more appealing to read).
Heswall was the day's logical starting pint. Yes, pint. Armed with Colin and a returning Daddy BRAPA after minor ear surgery, we landed in Lime Street at 10am but it wasn't until 11:40am until we reached the Hes.
Tucked deep on the Wirral, it has a train but that is half an hour from the town. It has a bus station, but none of the buses are particularly frequent or go anywhere worthwhile. I'd go so far as to say it pairs better with Wrexham than Liverpool.
Amazing that the likes of Jim Bowen, Beefy Botham and John Peel ever escaped to brighter showbizzy lights.
By 11:55am, it was time to apply some pressure to the hopefully soon-to-open micro with a selfie of intent .....
Daddy B. has more secret squirrel alertness than me, and at approx 11:57am, spies the owner popping into the bakery next door.
Dad uses all his experience to position himself between bakery and micropub, and when bloke returns with sausage roll, 12:01pm, makes sure he is in a position to tailgate his way in. It is top work from BRAPA Person of the Year 2023 and the amiable owner puts up no fight. After all, we MUST get the 12:28pm bus or it could be curtains for my Wirral completion plans.
Beer Lab, Heswall (2594 / 4755)
Didn't look much, especially in its converted shop unit location, but this was a perfect example of a micropub. I don't find Merseyside the best at them, surprisingly perhaps as the inhabitants are supposed to be warm and funny as a rule. Starting with the excellent owner, this was a shining blueprint of everything they should be. Great selection of historic GBGs for the bonus point. Bit of Purple Moose chat, how to pronounce Madog, and a perfect pint of bitter is ours. Purple M. sure know how to brew good stuff. Time after time. Tasty bakery smells permeate the walls, much nicer than Melksham's nail bar problem! 12:24 and I say to Dad 'look, let's get gone now, on the off chance the bus is early'. Rank 2/6 SILVER MEDAL!
And I'm so glad we did, bus is shooting past at that very moment! I leg it to the stop, Dad in hot pursuit.
Thankfully, a young lad is waiting to flag it down. And also thankfully, his transaction with the driver isn't a swift contactless manoeuvre, allowing us chance to make it. "You early?" I ask driver. "Oooh maybe a minute?" he replies. Errrm, try three!
"Well, I think that is what you call a highly successful tick!" says Dad joining me on the wheel arch. I puff out my cheeks and roll my eyes.
Dad presses the bell just before the Irby roundabout, but the driver, who had changed at Heswall bus station into a different man, is as equally incompetent as his former self and doesn't stop until AFTER the stop we've requested, giving us a longer walk. Cheers mate.
Irby Mill, Greasby (2595 / 4756)
The ghosts of BRAPA past always tell me to approach anything with 'Mill' in the name with the expectation that it will be lame dining hell. So I'm delighted to report just how much of a pub this was. From the second we step inside, the bubbly barmaid with the big lips welcomes us into the bosom of her abode. The Mobberley toffee stout is the nicest thing I drink all day, and she directs us to the fireplace for a warm through, the low ceiling and worried beams being the final pieces in a pleasant jigsaw. We end up moving to cooler climes, having man-spread ourselves over an entire room, and when we leave, three lively liver birds are quick to jump into our grave. Rank 3/6 Bronzey Brilliance
The walk into Greasby proper isn't as onerous as I'd been expecting. EVERY other building is a pub up here, how marvellous. No wonder former Greasby favourite and 'Spoons pint completist Leon Foster is one of the finest #pubmen of the modern era with this kind of teenage grounding.
Coach & Horses, Greasby (2596 / 4757)
This was the only place all day where I removed the famous former Blackpool_Jane hat, that is how much I loved our third tick of the day. Homely. I shouldn't have been surprised, I'd recently been chatting to a Wirraly couple in York's House of the Trembling Madness (the Medieval one, not the 'Craft Beer Mansion') and they'd recommended this pub through drunken sips of 20% Cloudwater. A dopey elderly dog called Molly takes a shine to me, but the owner reveals he gets confused and thought I was Daddy (not D.BRAPA). Great traditional layout, still a sense of the entirely separate rooms it once had, the two wooden settles are particularly handsome but my 'wooden settle for anything less' joke on X deserves greater plaudits. Black Sheep Respire a good drop, not quite South Cave quality, but a winner overall. Rank 1/6 GOLD STAR
And that's part one done. The three best pubs of the day coming early on.
Watch it all unravel in part two which I'll bang out half time on Friday night whilst Hull City are losing to Sunderland.
Keep it pub, Si
Might want to alter that last sentence 😁🐯
Very good! Should you return, there's a bus from center of Liverpool to Heswall every 20mins, takes ~45mins