BRAPA .... IT'S THE ENDERBY OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT (Leics 1/2)

It's raining, it's pouring, but BRAPA wasn't snoring on this Thirsty Thursday as I find myself back in Leicestershire, determined to find some GBG pubs that open at noon or thereabouts without doing the 'easy' stuff in Leicester itself. 50% Leics completion was my aim by the end of May.

Excuse the pun but I'm making 'heavy weather' of Leics and Lincs, although Notts & Kent have come a bit easier.

I'm not suitably attired for this unscheduled downpour, though I guess I do have a hood of sorts and something vaguely waterproof, the bus driver is being a cantankerous know-it-all, and in short, I'm a bit fed up!

And the GBG hasn't helped by LYING to me.

One of the two pubs (both early openers) listed under Enderby has the Narborough station symbol, indicating the pub is a ten minute walk or less. Now I'm a fast walker, but Google Maps tells me it is closer to 40 mins. I guess I should be actually thankful a bus is nicely timed!

The rain mercifully stops as I trot up a busy main road, around a leafy corner, to find my first tick, looking a bit grey, lumpy and in keeping with the current conditions. It opens 10am apparently, possibly for breakfast and coffee judging by the name. I can see shadows in the window. Phew! Let's go in.

I think it's about 11:57am when I wander in and ask this cool looking dude for a pint at Mill Hill Cask & Coffee, Enderby (2479 / 4373) - he glances up at a clock, realises it is near enough noon, and pulls me this local Mill Hill Mild. A Mild is a great way to start any BRAPA day, especially when you have work on the Friday. I'm relieved to find that this micro has a much warmer, more homely feel than what I'd been expecting on the approach. The main dude Jay, top guy, asks if I've come far, I say 'not really, only York' but apparently this is an impressively long enough journey to get us chatting. He introduces me to a second Jay, this one Austrian but an active local CAMRA chap who is also very personable and as it happens, interested in BRAPA. Just like Hastings White Rock Hotel last time out, this pub has a mini selection of Tunnocks Caramel Wafers and Teacakes for the bonus point! Funny how stuff like this comes in twos. And to meet two Jays together is unusual too. Not since those weird pink birds used to congregate in my parents garden have I seen more than one Jay in the same place. I let Austrian Jay do the GBG ticking, supervised by a suspicious Colin who once had a bad nasal infection in Vienna and got given these weird green pills at the apotheke (oh hang on, that was me). This Jay says he might see me at my next pub too, and I leave with a new found positivity and spring in my step! Maybe today could be great after all?

Two Jays and a Cauliflower

I trot down the road and around the corner, and I must confess I nearly missed this pub in the GBG on account of having to turn the page to find it. You'd think that I'd have learnt down the years that turning pages to achieve GBG success is very much a pre-requisite.

But I can be a dimbo at times.

Thought bloke on inn sign was taking a selfie at first, which shows how the modern age has ruined me

I've only been in a smattering of Everard's pubs down the years, and I'm not sure why, but they always leave me underwhelmed despite seemingly having the best of intentions. New Inn, Enderby (2480 / 4374) was the perfect example. It looks the part. Thatched, 1549, warped beams, a characterful shape, obviously trying to cling to a modicum of history (whilst foodifying itself in a modern way). Barmaid is vaguely welcoming. There's an excellent 8.25/10 carpet in parts. A hidden skittle alley. AND one of those very Leics / Lincs modern covered walkways to a loo that was perhaps outdoor bog in the 'good ole' days'. 'Spice up Your Life' plays for the first time since 2001. Nowt wrong with the quality on the 3.5% 'Golden Hop', it is just a bit thin and characterless. And now I think back, the last time I remember having a truly great pint of their Tiger was in 2005. And that was in Luton for heaven's sake. I'm necking the ale anyway because a bus is imminent, as Austrian Jay pops in for a second cameo. We chat Eurovision, red wine and how drinking cans at home in your pants will never beat a good pint down the pub.

Finally, it was Hinckley o'clock but before I concentrate on the three more central ticks, I had one more tricky tick up my sleeve.

To achieve it, I walked a winding 25 minutes through this new build housing estate, past a giant Parcel Force factory, and through a leafy tree-clad area that was probably supposed to offer concessions to nature. The clouds hung thick grey and menacingly in the sky. 'Don't you dare!' I kept thinking, as I emerge on the busy A5 where the pub was located. The GBG said Burbage, my map seemed to suggest we were still closer to Hinckley.

Lime Kilns Brew Pub (2481 / 4375) to give it the full name (not that I witnessed any homebrews today), and I was getting some serious Royal Oak Car Colston vibes in terms of the sheer volume of elderly folk full of jollity, their heads placed firmly in the nosebag in what was, when all said a done, a traditional no-frills pub. Another to add to the 'mid afternoon closure, I don't believe it!' list. 3pm it says which was fast approaching. As I step up to order a much needed pint of Bass FTW, the guv'nor who has an air of Leicestershire ABBA chic about him (an underrated look) is moaning to a local at the bar that yesterday the place was empty, now it is full and he doesn't know where everyone has bloody come from, and how he is dreaming of his holidays! Stockholm probably. With the last orders bell surely imminent, a stripy lady opposite me who's already given Colin a drooly smile which seemed to involve melting cheese on his forehead, ploughs through a mound of mash, carrots and gravy with great deliberation. Her furtive looking trio of companions are trying to spark some urgency by loudly debating the merits of a late sticky toffee pudding (hint hint). But the point I really want to make is that despite all this grub around me, it was 100% pub, the Bass was great, and the place had a great spirit. Of course, I never saw any signs of mid afternoon last orders cos IT IS A MYTH.

Join me on Friday for part 2 as I head back into Hinckley proper for the trio of GBG pubs in town.

Thanks for reading, Si