BRAPA in ..... FRIDAY I'M IN LOVE WITH WEST SUSSEX (NO CURE FOR PUB TICKING)
4 minutes ago
7 min read
Friday 7th August 2026
Coming at you live from Horsham, day two of my long weekend in West Sussex began with a quest to buy a birthday card, which I decided to combine with an early morning pre-emptive 'Spoons.
Swan Walk shopping centre felt like a particularly challenging escape room, but having found a desultory shelf of cards in M&S, escape I did.
A giant game of snakes 'n ladders isn't compulsory on the way into 'Spoons, but as pub ticking feels like that at times (the snakes represent September's #CruelChurn), I had a little shimmy across the board.
I'll tell you about Lynd Cross if it ever makes the GBG again (it has twice in the distant past) but the ale was decent, the pub full of moody Mums and Grans begging for the school holidays to end. I sat outside and in Horsham's brilliant blue sunshine, squint and you could be in a Roman Piazza.
After yesterday's rural rigours, I decide to be 'sensible' (well, as sensible as one can be pub ticking in West Sussex) and stick vaguely to a train line where ticks could be found in most towns along the route.
First up is Arundel. Beautiful castle aside, a hugely frustrating town which has even outsourced its tomb to Chichester.
EVERY year it rotates a sole GBG entry, guaranteeing another walk from station to town alongside the busy grey drag. Eleven different pubs have appeared here over the years. Two are now private houses, one doesn't offer cask at all, NOT that that's stopping CAMRA these days but hey ho.
This year (well, last year as we're still in 2026 GBG era) we have the Norfolk Tap, Arundel (3570 / 6361. In twice previously as the Norfolk Arms and if you are wondering why I'm the man with all the West Sussex stats, I've done a deep geeky dive on the county's GBG history. You get a sense of the former coaching inn as you enter through the arch, I imagine riding my thirsty horse in here, where four gents in top hats take 'Stabilo' (the obvious name for my horse), offsaddle, tether him and give him some water. Inside, it has been 'Londonified', all things bright and craftiful with board games (please no more snakes 'n ladders), lunchtime clipboard menus and lame spider lights as Billie Jean and Bad by Jacko play. You could dangle a baby precariously out of the large open windows, which offer such a welcome breeze, I end up having breezy breeze banter with not one, but TWO blousey ladies who stink of Arundel. Barmaid's a darl, and we have some stilted chat about the pump clip artwork and the likelihood of a comet hitting Sussex before dusk. I'm facing a low slung leather sofa, and soon a couple sit opposite. The lady takes out a neck pillow and her partner whsipers that she needs to sleep i.e. sup quietly Si! She finally wakes, informing me that Rummikub is a brilliant game, and that Bosham and Cosham are pronounced differently despite their locality. Top facts. Amazing what a sleep can do to sharpen the brain. We chat BRAPA, with a Hants borders bent, before I push on.
In a futile quest to eliminate a 2028 return to Arundel, I visit the Red Lion (4 previous entries, felt tired and morose, as was my half) and the Swan (14 previous entries, gastro Fullers house with excellent staff and HSB).
2027 GBG update ...... Of course you can never second guess Arundel. It has (unfairly) de-guided the Norfolk Tap, reinstated the King's Arms where I enjoyed the pub but found beer quality poor a couple of years back. AND added the White Hart, 8 previous appearances but not since 2006. FML!
Next stop Amberley, a BRAPA debut town and I can tell thee, 'tis more than an amble to reach our pub out in t' sticks. Thankfully there's a few stretches of pedestrian pathway, because pavements are scarce and the drivers are peak Somerset / Kent impatient speed demons.
The road name is the same as the surname as my friend's whose birthday it is. Perfect place to write the card and post it. She's due to give birth any day, but tells me she doesn't want the baby stealing her limelight so is trying to hold it in until after Sunday (something she did achieve!)
On a similar note, I'm struggling down below and practically touching cloth by the time I reach the pub. Thankfully the loos are by the entrance, but I walk the last five mins like an ailing crab.
Quite foolishly, the Sportsman, Amberley (3571 / 6362) has pulled stools and tables across the main bar which limits standing space at busy times (like today) when you're trying to get served. Forcing a pub queue which for once, isn't the punters fault. Thankfully, this was the low point and once I'm presented with a delicious Cheriton Porter, I begin to appreciate the character, age and particularly the uneven stone flooring. I find a relatively secluded spot away from the hideously fussy diners with fantastic views out over the rambling countryside. A lady in a flowery blouse reveals she once saw 'Andrew' Burnham outside a Persian restaurant but being northern, he did little to impress her. Her views on drinking in the stands at Blundell Park were not sought.
In my bid to tick the pre-emptive Bridge Inn (getting top scores on the CAMRA website and 8 previous appearances), I accidentally find myself ordering a pint at the Black Horse, but neigh bother because this too in doing quite well and has been in the GBG four times. It was a bit 'try hard', beer a step down, but had to appreciate the efforts and smartly dressed countrymen manning the bar.
2027 GBG update - I wasn't punished. Sportsman kept its place. And neither of the other two made it.
Time for an Uber cheat as I didn't fancy a walk back to the station, just to have to get off at Pulborough and catch an hourly bus out west. Especially as it was another warm day. Fairly expensive, but didn't make me baulk at the price, so I cracked on with the order.....
Only a second ever appearance for self-contained Butcombe flounce-hole Welldiggers Arms, Petworth (3572 / 6363) and it soon became clear why. The stand out feature here is the handpumps in the shape of welldigging implements, and my Adam Henson Rare Breed looks like it has been dredged from a well. I eye it with suspicion. "If it doesn't taste right mate, bring it back over and we'll change it" murmurs the barman. The army of staff are jovial to a tee. Obviously, it doesn't taste right. I won't get an easier pint return all year. "I'm amazed you even tried it mate!" says a rosy cheeked villager at the bar letting me push in front of him. "So am I!" I reply. The Original drinks much better. The staff looked vaguely embarrassed. I made sure my GBG was visible. The bar is curved, the ceiling low, the cuteness of all around me continues. So all is forgiven. But this seems to be one part of W.Sussex that struggles to know which pub to select for inclusion aside from the excellent West Chiltington.
2027 GBG Update - Binned! Imagine my shock(!) The two possible replacement pubs (Selham and Graffham) are both harder to get to than this, but are former Guide regulars which haven't been in for a decade or so which as a West Sussex stats geek, I find thrilling.
Pulborough, and onto Billingshurst where Daddy BRAPA once went to pick up an antique plate from an eBay seller without stopping for a pint because that's the way he rolls.
Sunken just below pavement level, the Billi Tap, Billingshurst (3573 / 6364) does something micros can struggle with and oozes character with its worried warped beams and serving hatch. There's a healthy crowd in this afternoon. I hate choosing beers from busy blackboards rather than looking at a row of pumps, and when a lass asks "what style of beer do you normally go for?" it only increases the pressure, so I mutter something about stouts and porters and I'm pretty sure I ended up with summat keggy but nae bother, it tastes good. I nurse it in a partitioned section over to the left. Which causes me to wince every time an increasingly pissed locals comes back from the loos and thwacks their head on a beam because they've forgotten themselves. One redhead, ouch, I actually felt her pain. The main guy spots my GBG and sits with me for a chat. He looks young but remembers his time at the original Dark Star so perhaps he uses a really good moisturiser. Tells me of the struggles running a pub with a lethargy of a Victor Portishead or Mr Priddy.
2027 GBG update - of course it's still in. I'd have been shocked if not. Five years in a row now. Not too much competition in Billingshurst, ties in with what I'd been told.
Today had been lacking a ridiculous BRAPA walk. This almost matched my Lower Beeding to Faygate epic yesterday. I'd chartered an OS route across all sorts of thickets and vegetation. Felt proper swashbuckling, until the novelty wore off and I felt stupid for attempting it. Thought I was gonna get mauled by a tiger when I hear a rustling as I pee behind a tree (sorry, too soon).
Anyway, made it finally!
Friday evening by the time I arrive so I guess it makes sense, but just where the flippin' eck had all these people come from?? Proper buzzin' atmosphere, yet the sleepiest of locations and not a great deal of cars parked up. Welcome to Queen's Head, Barns Green (3574 / 6365) which I'm delighted to report is largely traditional with a delectable 9/10 carpet, beams and horsebrasses. The hairiest bar blocker seems taken aback by my effusive praise of the gaff, but I guess time stands still when you live in Barns Green. With seating sparse, the stuffy warmth causing me to sweat and my legs bloody killing me, I 'take the difficult decision' to take my pint outside. Hogs Back. One of those famous breweries down here (well Surrey/Hants) which I've never gotten along with. This tastes like hoppy glue and I can't work out whether it is a pub or brewery issue, but I'd rather blame the latter. With the sun setting, all is idyllic and my mood is only enhanced when an Uber says he'll take me to Christ's Hospital, which isn't actually a church or a hospital, but a school and a train station. Make it make sense West Sussex!
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